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(Adapted from www.attachmentexperts.com) What is Attachment?Attachment is the deep and enduring connection established between a child and caregiver in the first several years of life. It profoundly influences every component of the human condition – mind, body, emotions, relationships and values. Seven-year old James is having considerable difficulty learning to read; nine-year old Chrissie hates maths and has trouble remembering her times tables from one week to the next; eleven-year old Martin has always had trouble with spelling; and ten-year old Simon writes really slowly if he wants it to be tidy. Sibling relationships serve an important function in the emotional and social development of children. Siblings actively shape one another’s lives and prepare each other for later experiences both within and beyond the family. Children learn many crucial lessons about sharing, competition, and compromise through their interactions with their siblings. What can an adult do when a child is really angry?
SOCIAL SKILLS TRAINING
It’s 8.45 am on a school day. Everyone is ready to leave except Jason (8 years old). He has spent the morning in his pyjamas watching TV, playing with the dog, and fighting with his sister. Repeated requests from his mother to get ready have not produced any progress. Finally, she yells at him, and threatens him with no TV for a week. It’s 5 pm, and 9-year old James is arguing with his mother about doing homework. He says it’s too hard and she says that it’s not. After all, his teachers say that he’s very intelligent, so how can it be too hard? James ends up in tears after a shouting match that leaves everyone in the house unsettled. It’s 3.30 pm and ten-year old Aaron’s mum is waiting for him at the school gate. She sees him coming out – dragging his feet and looking miserable. One of his friends, Jason, asks if he wants to come and play – Aaron mumbles, "No". He gets into the car and snaps at his mum when she asks how his day was. They drive home in silence as he stares out of the window. Six-week old Meg has just been diagnosed with cystic fibrosis, Johnny (who is eight) has a heart condition, and ten-year-old David has undergone repeated surgery to correct the effects of neurofibromatosis on his spine. INTRODUCTION TO ANXIETYThe majority of children and adolescents who come to our service are anxious. Some have specific fears such as fear of dogs or the wind or heights. Some are anxious about making friends or doing well enough at school. |
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